Punk! #622

Jeez Louise, this forthcoming first round Soundwave line-up announcement for 2016 better be a frickin’ whopper, because the handful of acts we’ve been slowly drip fed so far are just…awful. Especially for fans of punk rock. I mean, come on. Chances are, if you’re reading this column, you could give two shits about Northlane, Bullet For My Valentine, and a handful little-knowns I can’t even remember the names of any more. Sure, Refused are on the bill, but, meh. Where are the bands that have been blitzing American and European music festivals the last few years? Why isn’t anyone bringing US the likes of Social Distortion, Sum 41, Death From Above 1979 or the Descendents? Seriously. AJ Maddah seems to enjoy pandering to the bogan metalheads and emo/screamo crybabies, but half arses it with us. I love New Found Glory as much as the next person, but if they appear on one more Soundwave line-up I’m going to cut my nipples off in disgust. And for the love of the dear, sweet baby Jesus, no more Steel Panther. They’re just plain old shit compared to the far better glam bands out there not getting any serious attention.
Sydney ska/pop/rock combo Deathmatch Handball are calling it quits and playing one last show at the Valve Bar in Sydney on December 11. They’ll be joined on the night by Kang and the mighty Batfoot. If you happen to be up there at the time, you gotta go!
The coolest stand-up comic of all time, the punk rock one woman Asian invasion Margaret Cho has put together a brand new show called PsyCHO (geddit?!), and she’s all set to take it on the road. Here’s hoping she brings this show to Australia, because we are DYING to see her back on Aussie soil, especially since she skipped us on the Mother tour. I’m still totally butt-hurt about it, because it was basically an entire set of Margaret impersonating her hysterical mother, and it’s not even available on DVD! If you’ve never heard of her before, please rectify the situation as soon as you possibly can!
Okay, so here’s the Nevermind The Warp’d Tour line-up I promised you last issue! Beerfridge (WA), the Flangipanis (QLD), One 80 Down, Skinpin (NSW), Colytons (NSW), Eager 13, Dead Joe, No Idea, Strawberry Fist Cake, Ramshackle Army, Shadow League, Suicide Tuesdays, I Am Duckeye, Laura Palmer, The Murderballs, The Captives, The Fckups, Dixon Cider, Join The Amish, Australian Kingswood Factory, The Outfit, In The Esky (GEELONG!), Red Light Riot, Wing Attack Plan B, Blind Man Death Stare and many, many more. Crazy! For more info, head over to the festival’s official Facebook page and like it to make sure you get up to the minute, erm, updates! Brunswick Hotel. December 5. Be there! Seriously.
Until next time, kids, that’s about it!
Written by Christopher Cruz