Dating has changed a bit in these last few years. We sit down with Megan Luscombe, certified Australian life and relationship coach and Hello Tiger Relationship Expert to talk about the old 'Honeymoon Phase'
The dating experience looks different for everyone, but one thing remains true to all, they each have a gloriously intoxicating (and all consuming) honeymoon phase. A period of time when the love-bug butterflies roam freely and chaotically throughout our system in a frenzied attempt to secure our attachment and permanence to the object of our desire (that being the person we’re dating).
But what happens when you’re going through all of this in an online capacity? When the person you’re going goo-goo over hasn’t even graced your presence, physically? How do we know if we’ve found love in an online place or if we’re stuck in the throes of lust?
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When we’re not physically dating someone are we still able to identify the signs and navigate the honeymoon phase? Put simply, yes. And that’s because the honeymoon phase doesn’t discriminate based on the proximity one has to the person they’re infatuated with.
Quite a few apps are bridging the gap in physical distance with more virtual activity. Hello Tiger (the new dating app encouraging Aussies to pursue real connections, with real people, in real time) encourages users to connect via a video call, with sixty seconds to test your immediate connection, before continuing to message on the app. Nowadays more singletons are seeking real connections in real time; wanting to know that they’re in fact speaking with who they say they are.
Here’s five signs you’re in the honeymoon phase of any online relationship:
You’re obsessively checking your phone to see if you’ve heard from them
We all know what this looks and feels like. The constant “did they text?”, “did they DM me?” or “do I have a snap from them?” It’s non-stop and it’s completely exhausting yet we’re addicted. If you’re glued to your phone in anticipation of when you’ll hear from them next…you’re in the honeymoon phase.
You’re talking about them non-stop and showing the communication you’ve had to everyone who’ll listen/look
We get it, they sent you a cute picture of their dog trying to drink a puppuccino and they now look like they have a puppy mustache, but we don’t need to hear about it forty times a day (that’s what your diary is for), and those texts? If you’re sharing screen shots of flirty exchanges with your friends and it’s giving you the giggles…you’re in the honeymoon phase.
You’re agreeable to everything
Nothing they say is wrong and you’re ‘so similar’ (said in a David Rose kind of tone)’, right? Wrong. You’re doing your best to come across as always on the same page and ‘totes the same person’ but that’s not the truth talking, it’s lust. If you’re going along with everything they say, becoming the ‘yes’ person and no longer truly being yourself…you’re in the honeymoon phase.
You’re not having any conflict and swear that it feels ‘too good to be true’
You’ve been texting/video calling/DM’ing online for a few months now and have realised you ‘just don’t fight’. Sounds like it’s too good to be true? That’s because it is. Having no conflict isn’t a good thing, it’s a sign of two people who don’t feel safe enough to be honest out of fear of repercussions or abandonment. If you’re avoiding conflict under the guise of being agreeable and not wanting to rock the boat…guess what, you’re in the honeymoon phase.
You’re wanting R rated pics and you’re happy as Larry to send them
We love an empowered individual who champions their sexual self via selfies and in the early stages of online dating presents opportunity after opportunity to do (and receive) just that. If you’re sending those nudes and putting in specific requests for your ‘me time’ adventures (yes, I’m talking about masturbating)…you’re in the honeymoon phase.
It’s important to know that whilst the honeymoon period feels great (and is very addictive), it isn’t a reliable guidepost to the success of a relationship or a couple’s ability to grow (or stay) together.
This makes knowing the signs crucial because if your ultimate goal of a relationship is to secure long-term love (and for most people it is), you’ll want to navigate the honeymoon phase because like all phases…it does end.
Try your luck on Hello Tiger here.