30 things we’ve all done on a night out in Geelong
10.08.2020

30 things we’ve all done on a night out in Geelong

WORDS BY TALIA RINALDO

The nostalgia.

The rules and restrictions put in place due to COVID-19 have left us missing many things (seriously, one more zoom birthday party and I’ll cry), but a couple of shots and a dance with the crew would have to be at the top of the list. It was only a few months ago that we could enter bar bathrooms, throwback multiple Mario Karts, and dance to Mr Brightside as it came on for the 14th time in one night.

It feels slightly ridiculous but we’re nostalgic for February, and now our daily conversations are about the deep regret that we took so much for granted when going out and about was uncomplicated… oh what fun we once had.

In honour of Geelong’s nightlife for which we so deeply miss, we spent the day reminiscing about the things we’ve all done on a night out on the sauce.

You hit up Eureka, Lambys and Home House all in one night (or you did Piano Bar, Beavs and St James)
We’ve all been there, there’s no denying it. The night starts off at Eureka (RIP); next thing you know you’re in the line at Lambys, and in the blink of an eye it’s 3am and the party must continue to Home House.

You’ve asked the Lambys bartender for the Mario Kart recipe so you can make them at home
They were just so, so good.

Before Uber, you stood in the Taxi line on Moorabool Street for HOURS
You just desperately wanted to go home.

You requested the Lambys band sing ‘The Horses’
Even though they don’t take requests.

You’ve spent a good portion of the night telling people you love them, especially when you do not love them
As if you’ve never confessed your love for the bouncer.

You’ve stayed at Lambys until those dreaded lights came on
Never Lamb alone as they say. A quiet Sunday night with a couple of wines at home turns into being 10 Mario Karts deep, smashing out Jessie’s Girl at Lambys until the light of death hits you in the face at close.

You’ve danced on the tables at Piano Bar
A must for any quality night out.

You’ve left Home House at dawn – and still kicked on to St James
Just go home.

You’ve stuck to the floor at Lambys
It’s a feeling we miss.

Lost your shoe on the upstairs dance floor at HoHo
It just seemed to happen, all the time.

Skipped pres and indulged in $2 vodka raspberries at Room 99
That Ethanol went down a treat…

Sat on the lap of the King Edward VII statue on the way to Lambys or Home House
Just couldn’t help yourself.

You’ve had deep, heart-to-heart conversations with strangers in the Lambys bathrooms
These people are always making you feel on top of the world, and somehow always seem to have pretty decent advice (at least we think so at the time). You even go as far to add each other on Snapchat and Facebook only to never see them again. Bless you, kind strangers.

You’ve felt rather comfortable in parking your drunken ass on the cold, hard dance floor downstairs at Home House.
You just needed a little rest.

You ended the night sitting in Kardinia Cafe with a bowl of chips, cheese and gravy
You might be intoxicated, you might not, but K-Caf has those late-night munchies sorted.

Hit Kebab Spot or Maccas after town
When you can’t be bothered catching a taxi to Kardinia Café, the next best thing is a lamb kebab from Kebab Spot or a Big Mac from Maccas after your huge night at every nightclub in town.

After a crazy night on the dance floor at Eureka, you stumbled across the road for chips and gravy at good old Scooters
So convenient, so delicious.

Shouted ‘Play Wonderwall’ at the musos
Play it again.

You used your Year 12 classmates name at the door for cheap entry
Remember when all your year twelve classmates were promotors for Eureka Hotel? You couldn’t scroll through your newsfeed without being urged to “use my name at the door for cheap entry” at least once.

You went to Lambys on a Sunday night with all your uni mates
Even though you had work early Monday morning. Sunday night Lambs was just the number one spot to go to end your weekend. Also, a great way to increase your chances of meeting someone from Geordie Shore.

You hit up Cloud 9 on Pako for a cheeky cocktail or two
The perfect pre-drinking location.

You’ve fallen asleep in the bathroom at UNO till someone comes knocking
You just needed a quick power-nap.

You’ve puked in Eureka (or HoHo, or UNO, or Bloom, or Rumours, or club4play, or Lambs) when nobody’s looking
Everyone knows what ‘Spewy’s’ is.

You’ve bought rounds of shots after shots at Beavs because money (or lack thereof) is nothing when you’re drunk
Make it rain.

The Room 99 stripper pole
We need not explain.

You’ve hooked a ‘Lambys Lap’ after losing your mates
It was a 50/50 shot that you’d find them.

You’ve waited for what feels like hours at the ATM inside Lambys
Remember when cash was a thing? It was always a rookie error lining up to Lambys without cash. If the bouncers were nice, they’d let you run to the ATM nearby.

You got around Darren Lyons at Homehouse at least once
Are you really from Geelong if you haven’t seen the nightclub owner/former Mayor of Geelong at HH on a Saturday night?

You’ve skipped the line
We’re not proud of it.

You’ve left Lambys because you can’t find your mates and there’s no damn reception.
Hey, where are you?

Where u?

Oi?

For more fun content, check out our piece, 27 Things Every Geelong Local Has Experienced.