Sometimes kindness comes SO easily to me. In fact, I’d go as far to say that mostly it’s my natural state of being, even sometimes some would say to a fault. I’ve often been lovingly teased by those closest to me about being kinder than I need to be and often when it’s not socially required. Like when I try to make our tables waiter laugh (sometimes with equality disastrous and hilarious outcomes), or when I insist on making small talk with the person packing my groceries because in my mind, now is always the best time to choose more kindness than needed.
Although like every “rule”, there is often an exception…
Sometimes (and if I’m really honest it’s often in the times that really matter and with those I love most) I feel like I’m just not strong enough to be as kind as my values would dictate. And my actions reflect this. The worst parts of me, my anxiety, my fragility, my fears and deep deep need for self preservation mean that sometimes I am sharp and snappy, selfish or defensive.
Now I’ve forgiven myself for this as I’m human and not meant to be perfect. But you know what I have learned? I’ve learned through the perspective of time, EVERY SINGLE TIME I haven’t felt strong enough to be kind, I look and wish I had been. I reflect and wish I could whisper in my own ear “Kim, you ARE strong enough”.
So this is my offering to you this issue Forte crew. Choose kindness. Even when you don’t feel strong enough. I’m not sure where this applies to your life right now, but I know a circumstance or person is coming to mind because you’re human and imperfect just like me. And even though you may not feel like it in the moment, you can choose a kinder tone. You can hold back from saying that harsh or snappy sentence. You can say, “yes” to helping that person again with something they should by now be able to do by themselves. You have have the strength within you. Our ability to choose our actions irrespective of our feelings is so much greater than we know. We sometimes simply need only try.
So follow your gut. Trust your instincts right now about situation that came to mind and choose kindness, even though you don’t feel you can. Because I promise you, your future self is standing next to you whispering “You are strong enough to be kind.”
All my love,
Follow Kim’s blog @thishotmessau